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Originally Posted by JimG. You know, I can't tell you how many acquaintances I have who get me on the phone and want to "plan" out a trip to go skiing. I used to play along and even would get annoyed when they wouldn't show up, even though I was going to be there anyway.
Then I realized something...I'M GOING TO BE THERE ANYWAY! Why am I making "plans"? So now, I stop my "friends" with their "plans" and just tell them to call me on the cell phone when they arrive at Hunter and I'll meet them. Much easier! The moral...make your own plans and plan to go alone if that's smart and safe.
And I put "friends" in that paragraph in parentheses because my best friends are out skiing anyway too. |
I've been watching this thread and thinking about my response. Jim captures my thoughts....just plan for you.
Might sound anti-social, and yes, I have read, "Bowling Alone," but I have found that for some reason people just don't want to commit to anything anymore. In college, we had no problem getting 20 people to sign up for a hike, but we'd be lucky if 5 showed up for the event. Approximately 24 hours before, the "cop-out" phenomenon would begin...or when my voicemail would begin to fill with people calling to get out of the event. Most would not call me, but leave a "silent" message so they avoided speaking directly to me. Some E-mailed. The excuses varied from "too much work" to "something else came up" to nothing at all. I at first was
but it just made me later
and
After time, the die-hards would show and we had a good time.
Now this is a more informal thing that you're experiencing. Personally, if I commit to something, I commit. I am weather wary and if things are going to be dangerous, I will push for a rescheduling. When I hike, I go solo and weather is the biggest factor...for safety, comfort, and to get the "just desserts" of my efforts. Needless to say, this spring has been pathetic for hiking thanks to the Monsoon season.
In planning, I set a hike and plan when I can do it and the weather cooperates. If friends come, cool. If not, I still go. I understand how frustrating it is though when something is planned so far in advance and your partners back out at the last minute. My advice would be to announce up front if the plans are rain or shine and set a deadline for the "point of no return." Communications solves lots of problems.