Friday night crew check in...

bvibert said:

Thanks for the offer. The underpants gnomes assure me they have a plan that they guarantee will get rid of the trolls. I'm a little concerned though. They won't give me any details, but from what I've seen they seem to be collecting a lot of propane canisters, chicken wire, citronella candles, vaseline, potpourri, Dr. Scholls gel insoles, turkey pot pies, and p-tex. That Troll-X sounds a lot safer, unfortunately I already have a contract with the underpants gnomes. I had to pay half up front.

I really wish they'd just hurry up and do what ever they're going to do, those trolls really stink. Only about half of them are potty trained and those that are never flush. They keep putting the new TP rolls with the paper hanging down the back too... :angry:

Click to expand...

hardline said:

what did i miss? what troll?

Click to expand...

Marc said:

and tell your lame excuse for staying in tonight.

The more bizarre the better. Reality not necessary.



Me? On my way home from work I was chased by a pack of reconnoitering fisher cats who almost got one of my tires. In the haste of my speedy getaway, I nearly ran a couple in their monster truck off the road. I stopped to make sure they were okay, and they were, but it distracted me from plugging my cell into my car charger. Since I couldn't reach the president because my phone battery was dead to tell him I was going to miss the flight to Camp David to advise the economic summit between him and Sarkozy, I was detained by the Secret Service, the FBI, the NSA and mall security just as I was about to pull in to my driveway. I told them if they didn't let me pass I'd call out my attack badgers. They left in a hurry, but not before hitting my mail box.

Busy re-aligning my mailbox, I completely lost track of time, and where I put my car keys. Therefore, I'm staying put until such time I can safely locate them.

It was a pretty average day. What about you?

Click to expand...

bvibert said:

I would have replied sooner, but I was swallowed by a sink hole that appeared between my car and house on my way in from running out to the store to get some restraints for the kids last night. The restraints were needed because we couldn't find a sitter and we wanted to go out. Anyway, I fell into the sink hole and spent the next several hours fighting with the troll people that lived at the bottom of the hole. Apparently they don't like living down there and have been trying to get out for years. I guess their short stature prevents them from climbing very high. Once we came to an understanding we worked together to climb out of the hole. I won't go into the details, but lets say that the escape method involved braiding rope from the trolls that I had killed during the epic battle.

The real unfortunate thing is the trolls are really lazy and all they want to do is hang around my house and watch TV, I can't get rid of them. They're kinda mean too, so I wouldn't trust leaving them alone to watch our kids. I'm close to an agreement with the underpants gnomes to help me get rid of them once and for all though. Stay tuned...

Click to expand...

Marc said:

I shoulda checked back in, this thread turned around. B, keep us updated with the troll situation. I think I've still got a can of Troll-X in my garage. You know, the stuff that you can spray from like 30' so when they get all angry you're at a safe distance.

Click to expand...

bvibert said:

Thanks for the offer. The underpants gnomes assure me they have a plan that they guarantee will get rid of the trolls. I'm a little concerned though. They won't give me any details, but from what I've seen they seem to be collecting a lot of propane canisters, chicken wire, citronella candles, vaseline, potpourri, Dr. Scholls gel insoles, turkey pot pies, and p-tex. That Troll-X sounds a lot safer, unfortunately I already have a contract with the underpants gnomes. I had to pay half up front.

I really wish they'd just hurry up and do what ever they're going to do, those trolls really stink. Only about half of them are potty trained and those that are never flush. They keep putting the new TP rolls with the paper hanging down the back too... :angry:

Click to expand...

bvibert said:

The lack of reading comprehension on this forum is really quite scary sometimes... :roll:

Click to expand...

bvibert said:

For those that missed it; Marc's intent for this thread was not for everyone to sound off about what they may or may not be doing on Friday nights, but rather to post some outlandish excuse as to why you didn't go out (my bolding for emphasis):



Hence my attempt to steer this thread back to the originally intended direction that so few of you seemed to comprehend:







The lack of reading comprehension on this forum is really quite scary sometimes... :roll:

Unless you people really thought that Marc spent part of his night re-aligning his mailbox?? I mean come on, an engineer re-aligning his mailbox! I can see how you'd think the rest of his story would be believable, but that part?? :dunce:

Click to expand...

bvibert said:

For those that missed it; Marc's intent for this thread was not for everyone to sound off about what they may or may not be doing on Friday nights, but rather to post some outlandish excuse as to why you didn't go out (my bolding for emphasis):



Hence my attempt to steer this thread back to the originally intended direction that so few of you seemed to comprehend:







The lack of reading comprehension on this forum is really quite scary sometimes... :roll:

Unless you people really thought that Marc spent part of his night re-aligning his mailbox?? I mean come on, an engineer re-aligning his mailbox! I can see how you'd think the rest of his story would be believable, but that part?? :dunce:

Click to expand...

Marc said:

Cereal.

I built and installed a self aligning mail box post like six years ago.

Click to expand...