Weddings: how much do you leave?

darent · Jul 2, 2011

never heard of leaving money at a wedding, we always just brought a wedding gift-I guess I will have to read Miss Manners again. I missed that one

ski stef · Jul 2, 2011

50 bucks per person..more for family and closer friends i think where 100 per person works better. I went to 5 weddings last summer and had NO idea about protocol for gift giving. is the one year to get them a gift still work? ... I would say about 50% of people I talk too think that rule stands. I agree with tipping open bar bartenders...I give a generous tip in the beginning to let them know ill be there a lot and like others have a said hopefully a free drink or two at the end of the night :beer:

Nick · Jul 2, 2011

I'm pretty sure you do'nt get a year to buy someone a wedding gift

ski stef · Jul 2, 2011

I know a lot of people that would disagree with you.. I don't but I have a handful of people convincing me otherwise when it comes down to it. I learned my lesson after a friends wedding. :wink:

Hawkshot99 · Jul 2, 2011

I hate going to weddings. They should be required to return all gifts if they dont make it a certain number of years.

tjf67 · Jul 3, 2011

Ski Stef said:
50 bucks per person..more for family and closer friends i think where 100 per person works better. I went to 5 weddings last summer and had NO idea about protocol for gift giving. is the one year to get them a gift still work? ... I would say about 50% of people I talk too think that rule stands. I agree with tipping open bar bartenders...I give a generous tip in the beginning to let them know ill be there a lot and like others have a said hopefully a free drink or two at the end of the night :beer:

Not for nothing but 50 bucks per person went out with the 80's. If someone does not have a job then ok buth otherwise it is just cheap. The up to a year thing is thank you cards.

Nick · Jul 3, 2011

I'm thinking back to my wedding 5 years ago and the majority people left us $50 a head. some left us 75, some who were really close left us 100, and then of course here were a few handful of people who left us even more.

Then you remember the really cheap ones. We had one family of five people that left us 80$ total.

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snoseek · Jul 3, 2011

Hawkshot99 said:
I hate going to weddings. They should be required to return all gifts if they dont make it a certain number of years.

I like this idea:wink:

snoseek · Jul 3, 2011

Nick said:
I'm thinking back to my wedding 5 years ago and the majority people left us $50 a head. some left us 75, some who were really close left us 100, and then of course here were a few handful of people who left us even more.

Then you remember the really cheap ones. We had one family of five people that left us 80$ total.

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I personally think its cheap to throw a party and expect any kind of money at all. 50 percent of the crowd would rather be spending their weekend doing something else....

bvibert · Jul 3, 2011

I didn't expect to get much money from my wedding, and that's exactly what I got, mostly memories and some pictures.

Nick · Jul 3, 2011

snoseek said:
I personally think its cheap to throw a party and expect any kind of money at all. 50 percent of the crowd would rather be spending their weekend doing something else....

Yeah right, who doesn't want to be in the presence or true love (can you name that movie)

snoseek · Jul 3, 2011

Nick said:
Yeah right, who doesn't want to be in the presence or true love (can you name that movie)

I'm hoping wedding crashers? I'm ok going to weddings as a single dude for sure:beer:

mattm59 · Jul 3, 2011

Niece's getting married next month. I hear i gotta' buy suits for me and my son:x. Fortunately, we're all cheap...and I don't drink. Maybe I'll give them a canoe, got more of those than money.

Nick · Jul 3, 2011

snoseek said:
I'm hoping wedding crashers? I'm ok going to weddings as a single dude for sure:beer:

Correct, wedding rashers. Although maybe i was paraphrasing, can't remember the exact quote.

*wedding rashers, haha. what a typo!

MR. evil · Jul 3, 2011

bvibert said:
I didn't expect to get much money from my wedding, and that's exactly what I got, mostly memories and some pictures.

The whole wedding scene makes me sick. Too much focus on money and other shallow crap. Randi and I eloped and it was one of best decisions we have ever made. On top of that we got to ski all day before the ceremony, and also skied the next day.

BTW: it was her idea to go away for a ski weekend and elope......I am one LUCKY bastard.

Nick · Jul 3, 2011

I think the perspective is really different with women. I can appreciate the idea of it seeming shallow and about money but I think it's more about women just wanting that "fairytale" day where everything goes perfect.

It's like most of us feel about skiing :lol:

MR. evil · Jul 3, 2011

Nick said:
I think the perspective is really different with women. I can appreciate the idea of it seeming shallow and about money but I think it's more about women just wanting that "fairytale" day where everything goes perfect.

It's like most of us feel about skiing :lol:

I guess I just know to many people (men & women) who were way to focused on how much they were going to make from the wedding......in everyone of those instances we gave a gift ( a nice gift) instead of cash. Know a few that made up a good portion of the guest list based how much they thought they would get from someone.

deadheadskier · Jul 4, 2011

I'm with Mr.Evil on this one. Can't stand the materialistic nature of weddings. We would've eloped, but my wife's sister already did and her mom would've killed her if she didn't have at least one daughter have a wedding party.

When we got married, we didn't register anywhere as we really didn't need anything. Folks gave cash, anywhere from $100 to $300 depending on how close they were to us and/or how affluent the guest was.

I honestly didn't care if we received any money at all. My biggest concern was that the experience didn't cost my friends any money to attend, but the gas to get there. Pretty much every wedding we've been to has cost us at least $500 to go, not including the gift. Some of those weddings, like my cousins in Newport, RI cost us $1000 for the weekend not including a gift.

We rented a house on Weirs Beach, NH, set up a tent in the yard and had our wedding there. That's what my signature is about. It was a seven bed room house, big enough for most of our friends. We rented a couple of cottages up the road for our other friends in attendance. Also catered every meal Friday night through Sunday morning. So, it didn't cost our friends a dime in food or lodging to be there with us.

Weddings shouldn't be about money. Not for the marrying couple and not for the guests.

mattm59 · Jul 4, 2011

we got married at a restaurant; rented a room, invited 50 friends and family. Paid for it ourselves. I think we said "no gifts", but as that was 25 years and 35 days ago, I can't remember. I do remember one gift now, that's right, but it's not one to mention even though statute of limitations is up:blink:...nothing like having friends in the mob:-o

SkiDork · Jul 5, 2011

Again, it depends on the locale. I live on Long Island, and 50 bucks per person is ridiculously low. Even in 2006.

Weddings: how much do you leave?

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