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Lies about Celery

legalskier

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Funny you should mention it- I just chopped some up for the tuna salad I made for tomorrow. I like celery- a little salt sprinkled on a crunchy stalk is a good snack.
 

ctenidae

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I have it on very good authorty that every single person who so much as looked in the general direction of celery prior to April 18, 1897 is now dead.

Let that be a warning to all you celery apologists. When the revolution comes, you will be the first up against the wall. Unless you've got a nice mirepoix going, leading up to a good chowder, or soup of some sort, or maybe gumbo. Mmmm, gumbo...
 

gmcunni

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Edd

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I have it on very good authorty that every single person who so much as looked in the general direction of celery prior to April 18, 1897 is now dead.

Let that be a warning to all you celery apologists. When the revolution comes, you will be the first up against the wall. Unless you've got a nice mirepoix going, leading up to a good chowder, or soup of some sort, or maybe gumbo. Mmmm, gumbo...

You have exposed your sarcastic self as one of the celery apologists you pretend to condemn, and you will be judged. This is how celery worms its disgusting self into our lives. People say "oh big deal, you can barely taste it!" Nonsense. A gumbo sans celery is still a gumbo, it's just a vastly superior gumbo.

When we are blindly wandering the scorched post-nuclear earth the growth and taste of celery will be unaffected. It's the healthy snack of the devil.
 

ctenidae

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When we are blindly wandering the scorched post-nuclear earth the growth and taste of celery will be unaffected. It's the healthy snack of the devil.

When we're blindly wandering the desert, I'll at least be blind drunk, having enjoyed several tasty bloody marys, complee with edible celery garnish. I will also be able to fashion new shoe laces out of the fibrous remains. And we'll see who's laughing then, funny man.
 

Geoff

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Let that be a warning to all you celery apologists. When the revolution comes, you will be the first up against the wall. Unless you've got a nice mirepoix going, leading up to a good chowder, or soup of some sort, or maybe gumbo. Mmmm, gumbo...

I have a big pot of gumbo sitting on the stove. I sliced the crap out of a fingertip yesterday chopping the celery.
 

〽❄❅

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umm before you go dissing celery...you haters do know about celery, birds (i think they call them swallows), and $$$ shots;)
 
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