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Skier Type Brainstorm Thread

highpeaksdrifter

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Charger – skis every run (not most, every run) hard and fast.

The Specialist – skis bumps or powder or trees, etc. on every run they take if conditions give them that option.

Fun Day Out
– gets there whenever, takes a couple runs, takes a break, ski, lunch, some more runs, break, one more, bar, it’s all good, glad to be there.

The Conservative - Finds one or two runs that have good conditions and rips them all day.[/quote]

The Flowmister: one who goes where ever the flow takes him. never takes the same line twice. gravity is his/her friend.

Family Guy - no not Peter Griffen, dude who pulls up in a mini-van or big old SUV wih wife and a bunch of little kids in tow, See Tribute to Christmas vacation Dad thread.

Racer-dude: Has all Spyder, Karbon, or Phenix clothing, race stock skis and only skis the groomers really fast. Travels all over on the weekends for masters races.

The Barbie/Ken Doll.- all decked out, best gear, best clothes but cant ski to save their life.

Split-Personality - All-Terrain: Moderate-Speed Powder: Charger

the jibronsky the wannabe-tag-along found in nearly every gang of park rats...the extra wide, unstable stance but he points them at the booters...and looks like a cat being thrown out of a window but you've gotta give him some credit...he's throwing caution to the wind and going for it...to the delight and dismay of the rest of us.

Gaper - Talks the talk but doesn't walk the walk...on new 1998 Parabolic Elan SCXs..100 dollar graphite poles...and a one piece ski suit with a fanny pack to the side..JEA!!!

the Pro-it all the guy or gal who takes being a ski instructor waaaaaay to seriously. Always critiquing every turn, always talking shop...usually has perfect hair. Typically a golf or tennis pro in the summer time. Even the other ski instructors can't wait to get away from this self proclaimed uberPro...the rest of the instructors dread the thought of being the only other person in the locker room with the Pro-it all.

The Barstool Starter Jacket with a pro sports team logo. Flask of Jägermeister. Rental equipment. Shows up at 10:00 hung over. Skis 3 or 4 runs in the gorilla stance at high speed on flat terrain. Off to the bar. Back out on the hill for a few more runs before happy hour.

The Vagabond - Never takes the same run twice. Always looking for something different. While riding the lift, always scoping out a new line or place to explore. Looks at the areas in between trails on the lift map to ski. When skiing marked trails, only found on the sides of the trail where all the pushed-off snow ends up.

Dirtbag Ripper usually on trashed, older equipment...like a late 90's Rossi Viper Z, clothing looks like it came from the second hand store, goggles are in rough shape, doesn't own a helmet, mismatched poles, overall scruffy appearance, but is a helluva skier...typically the dirtbag ripper is a tree or bump specialist...he's secretly admired by many of the other archetypes for his ability. Drives a rusty old Suby or small pickup...often a Toyota

Trustafarian mostly seen in western resorts...no aparrent source of income or a lifestyle that is impossible to afford on a $10/hr ski town job. Drives a newer SUV, has a sweet pad, all the toys, but shares grooming tips with the Dirtbag Ripper.

The Sick Chic...one of the most rare and hard to find of the skier types, virtually extinct in some areas. She skis better than 99% of the guys, she's 100% charger...sometimes she's a racer or former racer, a bumper, or a tele skier...hot or not so hot, doesn't matter, most guys would give their left nut to hang with her.

The Teleban members of this fundamentalist group of tele skiers are so militant they won't allow alpiners or boarders to ski with them. They all have "Randonee, french for can't tele" or "free your heels, free your mind" bumper stickers on their VW bus, pay no attention to trail closures, never enter the lodge...the den of the infidels, and other than casual associations with the Chargers and Dirtbag Rippers, they won't acknowledge or associate with anyone else on the hill. They always have good weed and will only smoke from glass...even on the hill.

Fair Weather Guy – he skis about 10 days a year, mostly after a big snow fall, or beautiful sunny day. He gets new gear every 7 to 10 years. He’d like to ski more, but lets life get in his way. The ski industry has a huge stake in this dude and markets right at him.




__________________
 
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The Old Hare she' s a former snowbunny waaaay past her prime...but she's still as dolled up as she was 30 years ago, wearing enough bling to attend a mob wedding, dressed to the 9's...face is overly tanned and resembling leather. Everything matches....she typically doesn't wear a hat (just had her hair done at the salon on Thu) and when you see her from behind in the liftline you're thinking...mmm, yummy mommy? Then she turns around...ahhh, she's not yummy, she looks like a mummy!
 
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The Old Hare she' s a former snowbunny waaaay past her prime...but she's still as dolled up as she was 30 years ago, wearing enough bling to attend a mob wedding, dressed to the 9's...face is overly tanned and resembling leather. Everything matches....she typically doesn't wear a hat (just had her hair done at the salon on Thu) and when you see her from behind in the liftline you're thinking...mmm, yummy mommy? Then she turns around...ahhh, she's not yummy, she looks like a mummy!


ahahahahahahahahaha
 
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The Mayor of the Mountain He's been at the hill for decades, knows everyone and has an opinion about everything. He'll talk your ear off in the lodge and skiing with him is part outdoor activity, part social gathering. He holds court in the lodge at apres, moves to the parking lot for spring tailgating.
 
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The Mayor of the Mountain He's been at the hill for decades, knows everyone and has an opinion about everything. He'll talk your ear off in the lodge and skiing with him is part outdoor activity, part social gathering. He holds court in the lodge at apres, moves to the parking lot for spring tailgating.

His name is Rodney and he hangs out with lots of 40-something poney-tailed dudes and some MILFs...he does not like rap music...and drinks Labatt Blue..
 
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His name is Rodney and he hangs out with lots of 40-something poney-tailed dudes and some MILFs...he does not like rap music...and drinks Labatt Blue..
At Sunday River his name is Tom, he's the Mayor of Barker lodge, holds court upstairs...his most frequent ski pals are 3 racer dudes all over 40 (yup, masters racers), all fast, solid skiers. The Mayor is well into his 60s but he's still a good skier...I'm sure he doesn't like rap, and he prefers Bud.
 
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C'mon, someone pick up the ball and run with it...lets hear one of you wiggle and giggle bump fiends come up with one for the uber bumper... how about something from the ladeis...Trekchick, Severine...thaller...
 

highpeaksdrifter

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Charger – skis every run (not most, every run) hard and fast.

The Specialist – skis bumps or powder or trees, etc. on every run they take if conditions give them that option.

Fun Day Out – gets there whenever, takes a couple runs, takes a break, ski, lunch, some more runs, break, one more, bar, it’s all good, glad to be there.

The Conservative - Finds one or two runs that have good conditions and rips them all day.[/quote]

The Flowmister: one who goes where ever the flow takes him. never takes the same line twice. gravity is his/her friend.

Family Guy - no not Peter Griffen, dude who pulls up in a mini-van or big old SUV wih wife and a bunch of little kids in tow, See Tribute to Christmas vacation Dad thread.

Racer-dude: Has all Spyder, Karbon, or Phenix clothing, race stock skis and only skis the groomers really fast. Travels all over on the weekends for masters races.

The Barbie/Ken Doll.- all decked out, best gear, best clothes but cant ski to save their life.

Split-Personality - All-Terrain: Moderate-Speed Powder: Charger

the jibronsky the wannabe-tag-along found in nearly every gang of park rats...the extra wide, unstable stance but he points them at the booters...and looks like a cat being thrown out of a window but you've gotta give him some credit...he's throwing caution to the wind and going for it...to the delight and dismay of the rest of us.

Gaper - Talks the talk but doesn't walk the walk...on new 1998 Parabolic Elan SCXs..100 dollar graphite poles...and a one piece ski suit with a fanny pack to the side..JEA!!!

the Pro-it all the guy or gal who takes being a ski instructor waaaaaay to seriously. Always critiquing every turn, always talking shop...usually has perfect hair. Typically a golf or tennis pro in the summer time. Even the other ski instructors can't wait to get away from this self proclaimed uberPro...the rest of the instructors dread the thought of being the only other person in the locker room with the Pro-it all.

The Barstool Starter Jacket with a pro sports team logo. Flask of Jägermeister. Rental equipment. Shows up at 10:00 hung over. Skis 3 or 4 runs in the gorilla stance at high speed on flat terrain. Off to the bar. Back out on the hill for a few more runs before happy hour.

The Vagabond - Never takes the same run twice. Always looking for something different. While riding the lift, always scoping out a new line or place to explore. Looks at the areas in between trails on the lift map to ski. When skiing marked trails, only found on the sides of the trail where all the pushed-off snow ends up.

Dirtbag Ripper usually on trashed, older equipment...like a late 90's Rossi Viper Z, clothing looks like it came from the second hand store, goggles are in rough shape, doesn't own a helmet, mismatched poles, overall scruffy appearance, but is a helluva skier...typically the dirtbag ripper is a tree or bump specialist...he's secretly admired by many of the other archetypes for his ability. Drives a rusty old Suby or small pickup...often a Toyota

Trustafarian mostly seen in western resorts...no aparrent source of income or a lifestyle that is impossible to afford on a $10/hr ski town job. Drives a newer SUV, has a sweet pad, all the toys, but shares grooming tips with the Dirtbag Ripper.

The Sick Chic...one of the most rare and hard to find of the skier types, virtually extinct in some areas. She skis better than 99% of the guys, she's 100% charger...sometimes she's a racer or former racer, a bumper, or a tele skier...hot or not so hot, doesn't matter, most guys would give their left nut to hang with her.

The Teleban members of this fundamentalist group of tele skiers are so militant they won't allow alpiners or boarders to ski with them. They all have "Randonee, french for can't tele" or "free your heels, free your mind" bumper stickers on their VW bus, pay no attention to trail closures, never enter the lodge...the den of the infidels, and other than casual associations with the Chargers and Dirtbag Rippers, they won't acknowledge or associate with anyone else on the hill. They always have good weed and will only smoke from glass...even on the hill.

Fair Weather Guy – he skis about 10 days a year, mostly after a big snow fall, or beautiful sunny day. He gets new gear every 7 to 10 years. He’d like to ski more, but lets life get in his way. The ski industry has a huge stake in this dude and markets right at him.

The Old Hare she' s a former snowbunny waaaay past her prime...but she's still as dolled up as she was 30 years ago, wearing enough bling to attend a mob wedding, dressed to the 9's...face is overly tanned and resembling leather. Everything matches....she typically doesn't wear a hat (just had her hair done at the salon on Thu) and when you see her from behind in the liftline you're thinking...mmm, yummy mommy? Then she turns around...ahhh, she's not yummy, she looks like a mummy!

The Mayor of the Mountain He's been at the hill for decades, knows everyone and has an opinion about everything. He'll talk your ear off in the lodge and skiing with him is part outdoor activity, part social gathering. He holds court in the lodge at apres, moves to the parking lot for spring tailgating.
 

severine

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I cannot possibly think of anything better than what's already been proposed. I think the kids stole too many of my brain cells. :oops:

Great list!
 

2knees

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C'mon, someone pick up the ball and run with it...lets hear one of you wiggle and giggle bump fiends come up with one for the uber bumper... how about something from the ladeis...Trekchick, Severine...thaller...

you're a tough act to follow. but i'll throw a few out there.
 

severine

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Lodge Mom - Used to ski...before kids. Now she's stuck holding down the fort while the kids (and probably dad, too) are out having their fun on the hill. You may find her knitting, clicking away on a laptop, or reading a book surrounded by a large amount of bags, shoes, and general paraphernalia for her family.
 

2knees

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The Line King.

no matter how crowded, no matter what may be in his way, this bumper is gonna hit the zipper. babies could be laying in the line but nothing will cause him to sway from his mission. Insults and vulgarities spew freely from his mouth. And for gods sake, dont try to strike up a conversation with him as he surveys his domain. You simply are not worthy of his time.
 

2knees

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The Techno Freak

the dude who over analyzes every move. We all know someone like this. You're just out cruising around and get on the lift when BAM, the advice just starts pouring out about technique, gear, clothing choices. Get your hands 2.3 millimeters higher. lean on your inside ski while rolling your outside pinky toe to 35%. You need 1/1000 of a degree more bevel on your edges. on and on and usually unsolicited.
 

highpeaksdrifter

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Location
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Charger – skis every run (not most, every run) hard and fast.

The Specialist – skis bumps or powder or trees, etc. on every run they take if conditions give them that option.

Fun Day Out
– gets there whenever, takes a couple runs, takes a break, ski, lunch, some more runs, break, one more, bar, it’s all good, glad to be there.

The Conservative - Finds one or two runs that have good conditions and rips them all day.[/quote]

The Flowmister: one who goes where ever the flow takes him. never takes the same line twice. gravity is his/her friend.

Family Guy - no not Peter Griffen, dude who pulls up in a mini-van or big old SUV wih wife and a bunch of little kids in tow, See Tribute to Christmas vacation Dad thread.

Racer-dude: Has all Spyder, Karbon, or Phenix clothing, race stock skis and only skis the groomers really fast. Travels all over on the weekends for masters races.

The Barbie/Ken Doll.- all decked out, best gear, best clothes but cant ski to save their life.

Split-Personality - All-Terrain: Moderate-Speed Powder: Charger

the jibronsky the wannabe-tag-along found in nearly every gang of park rats...the extra wide, unstable stance but he points them at the booters...and looks like a cat being thrown out of a window but you've gotta give him some credit...he's throwing caution to the wind and going for it...to the delight and dismay of the rest of us.

Gaper - Talks the talk but doesn't walk the walk...on new 1998 Parabolic Elan SCXs..100 dollar graphite poles...and a one piece ski suit with a fanny pack to the side..JEA!!!

the Pro-it all the guy or gal who takes being a ski instructor waaaaaay to seriously. Always critiquing every turn, always talking shop...usually has perfect hair. Typically a golf or tennis pro in the summer time. Even the other ski instructors can't wait to get away from this self proclaimed uberPro...the rest of the instructors dread the thought of being the only other person in the locker room with the Pro-it all.

The Barstool Starter Jacket with a pro sports team logo. Flask of Jägermeister. Rental equipment. Shows up at 10:00 hung over. Skis 3 or 4 runs in the gorilla stance at high speed on flat terrain. Off to the bar. Back out on the hill for a few more runs before happy hour.

The Vagabond - Never takes the same run twice. Always looking for something different. While riding the lift, always scoping out a new line or place to explore. Looks at the areas in between trails on the lift map to ski. When skiing marked trails, only found on the sides of the trail where all the pushed-off snow ends up.

Dirtbag Ripper usually on trashed, older equipment...like a late 90's Rossi Viper Z, clothing looks like it came from the second hand store, goggles are in rough shape, doesn't own a helmet, mismatched poles, overall scruffy appearance, but is a helluva skier...typically the dirtbag ripper is a tree or bump specialist...he's secretly admired by many of the other archetypes for his ability. Drives a rusty old Suby or small pickup...often a Toyota

Trustafarian
mostly seen in western resorts...no aparrent source of income or a lifestyle that is impossible to afford on a $10/hr ski town job. Drives a newer SUV, has a sweet pad, all the toys, but shares grooming tips with the Dirtbag Ripper.

The Sick Chic...one of the most rare and hard to find of the skier types, virtually extinct in some areas. She skis better than 99% of the guys, she's 100% charger...sometimes she's a racer or former racer, a bumper, or a tele skier...hot or not so hot, doesn't matter, most guys would give their left nut to hang with her.

The Teleban members of this fundamentalist group of tele skiers are so militant they won't allow alpiners or boarders to ski with them. They all have "Randonee, french for can't tele" or "free your heels, free your mind" bumper stickers on their VW bus, pay no attention to trail closures, never enter the lodge...the den of the infidels, and other than casual associations with the Chargers and Dirtbag Rippers, they won't acknowledge or associate with anyone else on the hill. They always have good weed and will only smoke from glass...even on the hill.

Fair Weather Guy – he skis about 10 days a year, mostly after a big snow fall, or beautiful sunny day. He gets new gear every 7 to 10 years. He’d like to ski more, but lets life get in his way. The ski industry has a huge stake in this dude and markets right at him.

The Old Hare she' s a former snowbunny waaaay past her prime...but she's still as dolled up as she was 30 years ago, wearing enough bling to attend a mob wedding, dressed to the 9's...face is overly tanned and resembling leather. Everything matches....she typically doesn't wear a hat (just had her hair done at the salon on Thu) and when you see her from behind in the liftline you're thinking...mmm, yummy mommy? Then she turns around...ahhh, she's not yummy, she looks like a mummy!

The Mayor of the Mountain He's been at the hill for decades, knows everyone and has an opinion about everything. He'll talk your ear off in the lodge and skiing with him is part outdoor activity, part social gathering. He holds court in the lodge at apres, moves to the parking lot for spring tailgating.

Lodge Mom - Used to ski...before kids. Now she's stuck holding down the fort while the kids (and probably dad, too) are out having their fun on the hill. You may find her knitting, clicking away on a laptop, or reading a book surrounded by a large amount of bags, shoes, and general paraphernalia for her family.

The Line King.- no matter how crowded, no matter what may be in his way, this bumper is gonna hit the zipper. babies could be laying in the line but nothing will cause him to sway from his mission. Insults and vulgarities spew freely from his mouth. And for gods sake, dont try to strike up a conversation with him as he surveys his domain. You simply are not worthy of his time.

The Techno Freak - the dude who over analyzes every move. We all know someone like this. You're just out cruising around and get on the lift when BAM, the advice just starts pouring out about technique, gear, clothing choices. Get your hands 2.3 millimeters higher. lean on your inside ski while rolling your outside pinky toe to 35%. You need 1/1000 of a degree more bevel on your edges. on and on and usually unsolicited.
 

highpeaksdrifter

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Lodge Mom - Used to ski...before kids. Now she's stuck holding down the fort while the kids (and probably dad, too) are out having their fun on the hill. You may find her knitting, clicking away on a laptop, or reading a book surrounded by a large amount of bags, shoes, and general paraphernalia for her family.


Very good call, we see her every weekend.
 
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new hampster
Lodge Mom - Used to ski...before kids. Now she's stuck holding down the fort while the kids (and probably dad, too) are out having their fun on the hill. You may find her knitting, clicking away on a laptop, or reading a book surrounded by a large amount of bags, shoes, and general paraphernalia for her family.

I feel bad for the lodge moms! I just don't see the reason for it...my mother will be 68 this year and she's good for 20 days a year, five days out west. She's made breakthroughs in the last couple of years after skiing for over 50 years. Her mother quit at 93. Lodge Moms, get off your duff and get out there, you can do it!
 

highpeaksdrifter

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The Techno Freak

the dude who over analyzes every move. We all know someone like this. You're just out cruising around and get on the lift when BAM, the advice just starts pouring out about technique, gear, clothing choices. Get your hands 2.3 millimeters higher. lean on your inside ski while rolling your outside pinky toe to 35%. You need 1/1000 of a degree more bevel on your edges. on and on and usually unsolicited.

Yeah, this guy is a pain in the balls. Usually a ski instructor or was one once. If I want his opinion I'll ax him.
 
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