Thinking of having kids?

[Phillycore]

Whose driving her around? Same car and people?

2-3 different cars....same crowd of people though
It's not like a drug house or anything like that.
Currently it's a weekend thing, but EVERY weekend...
I have seen what I believe is the "dealer" car come by pretty frequently though.
She just hops in and they leave and she comes back with a black plastic bag all the time.
The "dealer" is pretty obvious in this neighborhood... The guy never stays, always just picks her up and drops her off.. He used to just do it right there in the driveway until I called them out on it.

 

[mondeo]

Cute. And yet millions of us parents somehow survive another day...

One thing you quickly realize about raising kids is that there's a real level of selflessness that has to take place immediately. If you're not willing to give up a lot of your money, free time, sleep, and in some cases sanity, than this job ain't for you.

Which is why I'll wait until I'm at least 30. I figure that I want that someday, but I want my independence for the time being. Too much stuff to do that once I have kids, I lose the chance.

 

[snoseek]

2-3 different cars....same crowd of people though
It's not like a drug house or anything like that.
Currently it's a weekend thing, but EVERY weekend...
I have seen what I believe is the "dealer" car come by pretty frequently though.
She just hops in and they leave and she comes back with a black plastic bag all the time.
The "dealer" is pretty obvious in this neighborhood... The guy never stays, always just picks her up and drops her off.. He used to just do it right there in the driveway until I called them out on it.

Grass smokers usually just buy a bag and smoke it for at least a couple weeks (not usually very dramatic, easily hidden from kids unless she's a total idiot). I bet this is beyond just a little weed, hopefully I'm wrong.

 

[Phillycore]

One of the usual suspects (same couple that carried her up the steps last weekend) came to her house again today around 6:30 or so is when I noticed the car there.. been parked there ever since and another car parked out front of her house now (might not even be her company though...just happened to see the car there now when I just looked out)
The kids aren't over here and aren't outside so who knows what's going on... If the car in the driveway leaves and she's in it sans kids.. I'm going to flip, I know that much

 

[Swamp Dog]

yesterday I dropped my youngest off at college for the first time. I'm not liking this at all. Just when I get him all socialized and well adjusted, I have to send him away? I miss him terribly

 

[Warp Daddy]

One of life's tuff adjustments is the transition from being the HEAD coach in your kids life to being a CONSULTANT

Every fall when we welcomed our freshman class at teh college we saw this somewhat bittersweet drama play out !

And as a parent and grandparent i too have experienced this feeling -- it gets beter over time --

CELEBRATE the fact that YOU provided them the OPPORTUNITY and several years of GOOD coaching -- they'll do the rest !!

 

[Phillycore]

Guess who got carted off in an ambulance about 1 hour ago..
4 police cars and an ambulance come pulling up, kids on the porch screaming to get back in the house as policeman holds them. We asked if they wanted us to keep an eye on the kids but policeman said they can't do that. (We knew that already but we were trying to help out) Someone else came and got the kids and the addict left in an ambulance on a stretcher. Sitting upright but her whole body and face was all covered up. Who knows if it's drug related or not, but I'd ASSume it had something to do with it. At least she didn't kick the bucket in front of the kids.. The worst part about it is that the kids father actually took them for a night last night and didn't beat them to death, then they come home and the next night their mom is carted off in an ambulance.

It's a regular soap opera over there...and I'm not snooping, it's just THAT obvious.
Not to mention the kids are friends with my older son and they tell him and he tells me, then I tell you guys....

 

[Marc]

Solution:

 

[noski]

I keep wondering if there is not some type of Social Services, or Child Protection agency in your area. If that were happening here, the state would get involved pdq and put the kids in a foster home for thier protection.

Blessings to you and your wife for caring about - and for- these children.

 

[Phillycore]

Oh of course there is that here.. I'm only 10 miles from one of the top 10 largest cities in the U.S..

And yes she has a case worker...
The problem is they have her diagnosed as being bi-polar when the actuality of the matter is she's an alcoholic / drug addict.

Someone is home over there today because the door is open (I can see that by looking out my front door) I don't know if it's her, or the kids, or both, or neither at this point.
Nor do I know why she was taken by ambulance yet as I won't know the goods until her kids tell my kid and/or he decides to share that info with me or they decide to share it with him. School starts on thursday here so I'll know then if her kids are home or not as I leave for work about the same time all the kids in the neighborhood leave for their bus stops.

I hope everything is good....for everyone of course...

 

[SkiDork]

The problem is they have her diagnosed as being bi-polar when the actuality of the matter is she's an alcoholic / drug addict.

Probably linked. She's self medicating not under doctors supervision. I wish you luck with the help with the kids.

 

[severine]

The problem is they have her diagnosed as being bi-polar when the actuality of the matter is she's an alcoholic / drug addict.

A lot of people who are bipolar self-medicate with alcohol or drugs. Depression sucks.

Sorry to hear about that abysmal situation with your neighbors. Good on you for caring and taking her kids under your wing, in spite of the extra burden. The world needs more good people like you.

 

[Phillycore]

Well the kids came back home today....BUT
They were with their Dad and picking up their clothes and stuff.
They are moving in with their father, so hopefully things will get better for them.
The father has beat the younger one at least once, and hopefully that was a one time thing either way I'm sure the kids are assigned some sort of social worker that will look after them at this point. No sign of the mother yet... hopefully she's in some sort of rehab center getting her shit together. I'm expecting a real estate sign to go up any week now as her father wants to sell it. He just never did because she was living there with the kids. He married someone and moved to the finger lakes area about 2 years ago now..

 

[billski]

Thinking of Having Kids? Do this 11 step program first!

I thought about it.
Then I had them.
Then I stopped thinking about it.