Humor: Are you a Real Skier or an Expert Skier?

[Marc]

I have seen this before and while its worth the read and is pretty funny, it is rather dumb.

With the exception of a few annoying traits the Expert Skier might have, the Expert Skier is basically a Real Skier that grew up, got a job, got responsibilities but still loves skiing. Just because the "real" skier is a bum, smokes pot all day and can't mature past 18 years old, doesn't mean he loves skiing more.

Chris Davenport drives an X3 (yeah, the double cliche - SUV and Bimmer) - this disqualifies him from the Real Skier category, even if he bagged and skied down every 14er in CO in a single winter.

Yeah, but Dav is also one of the only guys Chuck Norris wouldn't kill in a bar fight.

 

[koreshot]

Yeah, but Dav is also one of the only guys Chuck Norris wouldn't kill in a bar fight.

Not even a round house kick?

How about a quick one-two from Law and Order?

 

[Hawkshot99]

Yeah, but Dav is also one of the only guys Chuck Norris wouldn't kill in a bar fight.

I am one of those 10. I can run real fast!

 

[kingslug]

Has an East coast skier /West coast skier list ever been done?.......................stir, stir, stir

 

[tree_skier]

The skier who gets his stuff out of the trash Tree_skier.:dunce: counts days missed snowseek.:beer:

I knew you wouldn't let that one get past you.

What I want to know BobR is at 4 deadheads per bedroom do you live with 36 deadheads in your 3 homes.

 

[campgottagopee]

This reminds of a day skiing at Whitface. My buddy and I took a quick break for a bowl of chili just as one of the kids race camps was coming in for a break too, The majority of the kids had on some seriously expensive jackets, vests, hats, gloves, boots, etc. There was however this one little dude who was wearing a carhartt jacket, old gortex pants w/ duct tape all over them, duct tape on the back of his boots (which was holding together the blown out cants) and his gloves were nothing but bucksin leather (wood splittin' kind). It wasn't too long before their coach walked by. My buddy says, " Let me guess...the kid w/ all the tape is faster than all of 'em, right??". Coach replies, " Damn right he is...they don't call that 200 mph tape for nothing". We all got a good laugh, and went about or day.

:beer:

 

[thetrailboss]

Like there is any question.....




[Real skier]



:wink:

 

[koreshot]

This one time I was in Portillo, skiing around, doing my thing. In the lift line, in front of me I see this kid, a total character. His ski pants are super baggy about to slide off his butt, the obligatory punk belt holding them up, fancy brand spanking new oversize ski jacket - not even zipped up, huge skis like he needs all that float, wearing a shirt that says "I am a skier". His hair is even kinda done up in that "its the 70s and I am a skate boarder and I don't care about anything" kind of way. Basically the whole package.

We get to the top of the lift and right away he starts skating over to the crazest line off the top of the lift. Very steep, sketchy snow, mandatory 20 footer. He snickers at the line as if its some kind of joke and drops in, cutting another skier off.

He makes a couple of pretty good turns, then points the skis down and straightlines off the 20 footer, pulls a smooth 360 and keeps going. It turns out this guy wearing all new, frashy gear, fancy 70s haircut and with no duct tape and no canting issues in his boots is Sage Cattabriga-Alosa, a pro skier who films with TGR regularly.

People get hung up on what the skiers drive to the hill, what they ski on, how they dress, etc... like any of that is a fool proof indicator of how well a person skis or how much he/she loves the sport and the lifestyle. For every rippin skier with gear held together by duct tape, there is a rippin skier tearing it up on the latest and greatest gear - and I have been schooled by both types about equally.

 

[Marc]

So putting duct tape all over my gear won't make me a core real skier?

 

[eastcoastpowderhound]

People get hung up on what the skiers drive to the hill, what they ski on, how they dress, etc... like any of that is a fool proof indicator of how well a person skis or how much he/she loves the sport and the lifestyle. For every rippin skier with gear held together by duct tape, there is a rippin skier tearing it up on the latest and greatest gear.

I second that...I've been working in this industry for nearly 2 decades and one of the few material things I'm fortunate to own are brand new skis and quality ski clothing. The cars are old, the mortgage isn't big...no country club memberships, no plasma tv...but all the best gear at little to no cost...doesn't make me any better or worse than the table waiting "real skier" or the bimmer driving "expert". That's one of the best things about our sport...the mtn doesn't care who you are or what you wear...dirtbags and CEOs can share the same lift ride up...and the mtn is the great equalizer on the way down.

Soapbox aside, the list is pretty funny and beats working.

 

[sledhaulingmedic]

dirtbags and CEOs can share the same lift ride up...

Isn't that redundant? ;-)

 

[koreshot]

So putting duct tape all over my gear won't make me a core real skier?

It will, but only if its over your mouth.

 

[Marc]

It will, but only if its over your mouth.

Lol... I kinda had that coming.

 

[nancy2]

Real Skier: Spent all last night loosening the bolts on pole 12 of the new lift

this one was not funny

 

[Vortex]

I knew you wouldn't let that one get past you.

What I want to know BobR is at 4 deadheads per bedroom do you live with 36 deadheads in your 3 homes.

Suprised you could do the math.:smash: