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Northern New England ski area locusts and their subspecies

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Granite1

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From another ski report:

"Attracting Jerries like flypaper. They can't help themselves, and they flail around there struggling."

Still trying to know exactly what Jerries are???? They must be very pesky locusts.
 

2Planker

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That's not what a Jerry is. If anything, a Jerry is the guy who goes as fast as he can down a cruiser, totally out of control and with total lack of regard for others.
…. while wearing jeans and a NY Giants “starter” jacket
 

4aprice

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Local's attitudes IMO are pretty funny. Hey it's springtime, most people are thinking warm, mean while the snow has decided to show up and may be sticking around for a while. Enjoy it. The last 6 weeks of the season are always the best .
 

Granite1

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That's basically it, though our team doesn't really compete against one another. There's 7 guys on the team and the top 5 best runs score for the night. We are all pretty equal in handicap, so any of us can end up being the top finisher on the team each night. We all just push each other to ski well, then meet in the bar after. Granite wouldn't like my teammates because most of them have beers after the races. I don't drink on work nights.
What a wus, joins a beer league and doesn't even have a beer after the race. How does your team let you get away with that? They should cut you!
 

Granite1

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Locust observations this past weekend indicate that much of the migration north is over. So a lot fewer were seen. The predominant are the peeps. I was at Cannon Sunday, in the line before the lifts opened. The climate at Cannon has always limited the number of locusts there. However, I did observe a subspecies that I named a nymph. A girl about 20 was wearing a puffy jacket and puffy ski pants that were too big for her. One pant leg was down to the top of her ski boot, and the other hung up on the top of the other boot. She had no helmet or hat and was wearing aviator sunglasses. It was 25 degrees. She was with another nymph about 18, wearing a buffalo check jacket, lightweight hiking pants tucked into the top of his ski boots, and a ball cap. Despite the temperature, he did not have gloves. Both were on rental skis.

On Saturday at Loon, there were a lot more peeps than Cannon. I saw a peep wearing a snowmobile helmet on the crossover lift. In the Paul Bunyan Room, I saw a Jerry wearing a bright yellow snowmobile, one piece with black stripes, and a matching helmet. I also saw a yahoo wearing a hockey helmet walking through the Bunyan Room, but no hockey jersey for some reason. However, I did see a huge Vinny, about 6'5'' and 275 lbs, in the North Peak lift line wearing a Patrice Bergeron jersey. Another young peep wore a Joe Burrow jersey, and another wore a Patrick Mahomes jersey.
 

jimmywilson69

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Without a doubt they looked at you and said look there's one of them dumbass freestaters who doesn't want us here.

It's amazing you take the time to write this stupid shit

And by the way, they're called Jerry's. They're at every ski resort and we all make fun of them. You're not on to something new
 

Domeskier

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I witnessed some toothless Daryl up at Cannon this weekend. He was giggling to himself and struggling to take notes on a used napkin - about other skier's clothing, it turned out. Later caught him rummaging through ski bags looking for shiny big city items to sell for meth. Not to be used while skiing of course. Because traditional backwoods values.
 

Granite1

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Without a doubt they looked at you and said look there's one of them dumbass freestaters who doesn't want us here.

It's amazing you take the time to write this stupid shit

And by the way, they're called Jerry's. They're at every ski resort and we all make fun of them. You're not on to something new
We don't consider you a locust. You are a wannabe. You know you wannabe living in Northern New England so you don't have to drive 8 hours to get to a decent ski area. Don't worry about the time it takes me to write my excellent commentary, comedy and satire. I can type 20 times better and faster than you, just like I can ski 20 times better and faster than you.
 

Granite1

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I witnessed some toothless Daryl up at Cannon this weekend. He was giggling to himself and struggling to take notes on a used napkin - about other skier's clothing, it turned out. Later caught him rummaging through ski bags looking for shiny big city items to sell for meth. Not to be used while skiing of course. Because traditional backwoods values.
I did not know Cold Rain and Snow was at Cannon.
 
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