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Would you let your daughter date a ski bum?

severine

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That was my plan too, didn't turn out that way though. ;)

I don't want to think about my daughter dating anyone right now, so I'm going to refrain from answering the question...
If her current choice is any indication of what's in our future, we're in trouble.
 
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As a former ski bum myself, I do agree with ECPH regarding the lack of benefits and long term security being a concern. I get that money isn't everything. I'm certainly not rolling in it in my corporate world job, but I'm much more capable of being able to provide for my wife now and future children than when I was living in Stowe skiing 80 days a year. Almost every ski bum friend of mine that lives a comfortable life style is able to do so from their trust fund, not by the income they make living that lifestyle.

I feel incredibly fortunate to have my ski industry cake and be able to eat it too...being able to provide for my wife and kids while having a career that I'm passionate about is priceless. No trust fund here, just two decades of chasing the dream...and a lot of time in the trenches.
 

darent

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3 boys and a girl. the daughter is the only one who will ski with me, a ski bum boyfriend would be better than the chef boyfriend !!
 

riverc0il

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Ah, they hypocrisy :)

See, this is why I am not having kids, so I don't have to worry about being a hypocrite.

Though I would like to think that if I did have a daughter, I would not put any (well, for the most part) restrictions on her dating because we all know what the word "no" does to a teenager. I would rather know who my daughter was seeing rather than having the whole thing happening behind my back.

And, c'mon guys... we are talking about "dating" not life long commitment. Guess I will just never know about having to come to grips with that internal dilemma. I do not envy you guys.
 

drjeff

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Personally I'm not worried about my daughter, since based on the b$tchy streak that she's already exhibiting from time to time as a not yet 6 year old, she won't be putting up with any cr@p from a slacker ski bum (if that's what the gentleman turns out to be) ;)
 

Trekchick

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Teach your kids how to make good choices. That is the most important thing you can do. You very quickly lose gatekeeper duty.

Best post of this thread! ^^^^^

That being said, I'd not only allow it, I'd encourage it! Ski bums are some of the happiest people I know!
 

deadheadskier

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Best post of this thread! ^^^^^

That being said, I'd not only allow it, I'd encourage it! Ski bums are some of the happiest people I know!

So are some of my grateful dead and phish tour buddies. Doesn't mean I'd want my daughter marrying one of them :lol:
 

severine

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So are some of my grateful dead and phish tour buddies. Doesn't mean I'd want my daughter marrying one of them :lol:
So you'd rather she be -meh- about life but secure with a rich man?

I realize there isn't a whole lot of financial security with a ski bum, but happiness is something money can't buy (no matter how hard you try!). I'd rather my daughter was with someone who enjoyed life and made her happy. But he better treat her right!!!
 

drjeff

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Even worse: my daughter married someone who doesn't ski OR board.

And yet we let him into the family. Go figure.

Well SOMEONE needs to stay at home and make sure the the apres ski meal and beverages are ready! ;)
 

deadheadskier

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Now you're putting words in my mouth. Where did I say or imply that I'd prefer my daughter to live a meh life with a rich man?

What I'm saying is that I think it's irresponsible to risk the livelihood of your family by not making sure you at least have the basics covered like health and disability insurance. 90% of my ski bum buddies don't have that. They're living the same lifestyle as they were ten years ago when I 'got out'. Multiple dudes sharing houses together scrapping to get by. And you know what? Many of them aren't nearly as happy now as they were ten years ago as they're basically out of options and realize that retirement is a pipe dream and it gets old living paycheck to paycheck. It's part of the reason I left that lifestyle and the touring around with Phish etc, lifestyle. I didn't want to be stuck in the same place ten years down the line.

Skiing and seeing live music are the two things I'm most passionate about. That's probably fairly easy to tell from my handle on here. That said, there are more things to life than just skiing or catching the next Phish show. I would venture to say that if someone can only truly be happy if they get to ski 100 days a year or go on tour each summer, that they're not a very rounded individual.
 

bvibert

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Now you're putting words in my mouth. Where did I say or imply that I'd prefer my daughter to live a meh life with a rich man?

What I'm saying is that I think it's irresponsible to risk the livelihood of your family by not making sure you at least have the basics covered like health and disability insurance. 90% of my ski bum buddies don't have that. They're living the same lifestyle as they were ten years ago when I 'got out'. Multiple dudes sharing houses together scrapping to get by. And you know what? Many of them aren't nearly as happy now as they were ten years ago as they're basically out of options and realize that retirement is a pipe dream and it gets old living paycheck to paycheck. It's part of the reason I left that lifestyle and the touring around with Phish etc, lifestyle. I didn't want to be stuck in the same place ten years down the line.

Skiing and seeing live music are the two things I'm most passionate about. That's probably fairly easy to tell from my handle on here. That said, there are more things to life than just skiing or catching the next Phish show. I would venture to say that if someone can only truly be happy if they get to ski 100 days a year or go on tour each summer, that they're not a very rounded individual.

The thread is about dating a guy, not settling down with him and starting a family. ;)
 

severine

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So you'd rather she be -meh- about life but secure with a rich man?
Now you're putting words in my mouth. Where did I say or imply that I'd prefer my daughter to live a meh life with a rich man?
Didn't mean it that way--my apologies. It was a question, probably not phrased in the best manner (and albeit a bit exaggerated).

What I'm saying is that I think it's irresponsible to risk the livelihood of your family by not making sure you at least have the basics covered like health and disability insurance. 90% of my ski bum buddies don't have that. They're living the same lifestyle as they were ten years ago when I 'got out'. Multiple dudes sharing houses together scrapping to get by. And you know what? Many of them aren't nearly as happy now as they were ten years ago as they're basically out of options and realize that retirement is a pipe dream and it gets old living paycheck to paycheck. It's part of the reason I left that lifestyle and the touring around with Phish etc, lifestyle. I didn't want to be stuck in the same place ten years down the line.

Skiing and seeing live music are the two things I'm most passionate about. That's probably fairly easy to tell from my handle on here. That said, there are more things to life than just skiing or catching the next Phish show. I would venture to say that if someone can only truly be happy if they get to ski 100 days a year or go on tour each summer, that they're not a very rounded individual.
You make a great argument for why a "ski bum" isn't the worst thing that could happen to a daughter, though. As a young guy, you enjoyed the life, then figured out it wasn't working for you in the long term and turned it around. I would hope my daughter would have discriminating enough tastes to select a young man of this ilk. :D
 

deadheadskier

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The thread is about dating a guy, not settling down with him and starting a family. ;)

Just dating, like during college or shortly after, go for it, have fun. That said, I'm sure most fathers look at whoever their daughter is dating in their 20's and size them up in thoughts of the possibility of a long term commitment.
 

bvibert

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I hope my kids are ski bums themselves, so I can live vicariously through them... ;)
 

severine

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Just dating, like during college or shortly after, go for it, have fun. That said, I'm sure most fathers look at whoever their daughter is dating in their 20's and size them up in thoughts of the possibility of a long term commitment.
It's a valid point. I was 17 when I settled down. ;)

I hope my kids are ski bums themselves, so I can live vicariously through them... ;)
Ditto!
 

deadheadskier

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I hope my kids are ski bums themselves, so I can live vicariously through them... ;)

my parents sure as heck didn't feel that way.

"When's this kid going to graduate college. He's damn near 25. When's he going to stop switching jobs so he can take a couple of weeks off chasing Phish all over the place." "Now he's got a college degree, why is he still a bartender and ski bum"

Fast forward 9 years: "When's this kid going to give us grandchildren, he's 34 forchrisakes"
 
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