I need a ruling on this one

[2knees]

So friends of ours who have a collicky (sp) 6 month old called this morning. we figured they were looking to do something tonight, or i should say my wife figured that. I was out at sears. anyway, instead they asked my wife to babysit tonight so they could go out to a x-mas party at a friends house. Now these people know my wife works nights and that I'm home alone with the kids an awful lot already. I'm pretty p'oed that they would even ask, and my wife is waaaay to nice to say no. They also know we are having christmas eve at our house with about 40 guests and we've been basically remodeling the entire house.

I never ask friends with children to babysit at night, matter of fact the thought would never even cross my mind. I have no problem taking a whole bunch of neighborhood kids for a few hours or so during the day. I do it all the time. But this just seems wrong to me. Kinda an unwritten rule that you dont ask people with young children to babysit for you unless its a real emergency.

thoughts?

 

[deadheadskier]

seems reasonable, unless the young children are of like age and can entertain each other.

 

[2knees]

seems reasonable, unless the young children are of like age and can entertain each other.

in this case, my wife is over there cause the kid is sleeping. If they wanted to drop the kid off during the day, i have zero problem with that.

 

[deadheadskier]

I guess I'm confused.

Are you against baby sitting for a six month old at night because you have young children yourself or (remove your kids from the picture) upset at having to baby sit for a six month at night in general?

Mind you, I don't share a similar familial situation as you. I lack these experiences, but I would imagine, when I do become a parent, I couldn't see myself asking anyone but family to take care of my kids at night until they're at least 2-3 years old. 6 months seems young.

 

[billski]

I don't think there is a right and wrong here. It's what you are comfortable with. If there is any issue, it's with your wife committing to having kids over without first OK'ing it with you.

Second, it's only good manners to make the request days ahead of time, unless of course it was an emergency, which this is not.

Night or day, well, that is personal preference: no right and wrong here. We have taken in kids for an evening when our kids were young, but usually they entertain themselves collectively.

In terms of over there/over here, it's generally more considerate to have the kid at your house, but I understand too well the go-to-sleep issues.

Signed,
Dear Abby

 

[tjf67]

So friends of ours who have a collicky (sp) 6 month old called this morning. we figured they were looking to do something tonight, or i should say my wife figured that. I was out at sears. anyway, instead they asked my wife to babysit tonight so they could go out to a x-mas party at a friends house. Now these people know my wife works nights and that I'm home alone with the kids an awful lot already. I'm pretty p'oed that they would even ask, and my wife is waaaay to nice to say no. They also know we are having christmas eve at our house with about 40 guests and we've been basically remodeling the entire house.

I never ask friends with children to babysit at night, matter of fact the thought would never even cross my mind. I have no problem taking a whole bunch of neighborhood kids for a few hours or so during the day. I do it all the time. But this just seems wrong to me. Kinda an unwritten rule that you dont ask people with young children to babysit for you unless its a real emergency.

thoughts?

Toilet bowl, Life is not always about you.

Is this the same neighbor you threw under the bus a few months ago?

Pick up a barbell and stop flexing your muscles in here. GEEZ if I do not like something I speak up not wine on the internetuke:

 

[tjf67]

So friends of ours who have a collicky (sp) 6 month old called this morning. we figured they were looking to do something tonight, or i should say my wife figured that. I was out at sears. anyway, instead they asked my wife to babysit tonight so they could go out to a x-mas party at a friends house. Now these people know my wife works nights and that I'm home alone with the kids an awful lot already. I'm pretty p'oed that they would even ask, and my wife is waaaay to nice to say no. They also know we are having christmas eve at our house with about 40 guests and we've been basically remodeling the entire house.

I never ask friends with children to babysit at night, matter of fact the thought would never even cross my mind. I have no problem taking a whole bunch of neighborhood kids for a few hours or so during the day. I do it all the time. But this just seems wrong to me. Kinda an unwritten rule that you dont ask people with young children to babysit for you unless its a real emergency.

thoughts?

Oh and here is the ruling. You are a tool

 

[Beetlenut]

Depends if they're willing to reciprocate on another night for you and your wife. Could always say no for some good reason I'm sure you could think of. As far as the colicky baby goes, tell them to get the kid to a pediatric chiropractor. One visit cured my kid of months of agony!

 

[2knees]

Oh and here is the ruling. You are a tool

good one kid. you're on fire as usual.

 

[MommaBear]

Sounds like they needed a break and called on someone they could count on to take good care of their child (your wife).

If your wife is working and it is YOU that will be watching the child, then I could understand why you are upset.

 

[2knees]

I guess I'm confused.

Are you against baby sitting for a six month old at night because you have young children yourself or (remove your kids from the picture) upset at having to baby sit for a six month at night in general?

Mind you, I don't share a similar familial situation as you. I lack these experiences, but I would imagine, when I do become a parent, I couldn't see myself asking anyone but family to take care of my kids at night until they're at least 2-3 years old. 6 months seems young.

nah, not cause its the baby is only 6 but because it takes one of us out of the house on the saturday before christmas when my kids havent seen much of their mom this week as it is. The fact that they knew this but still asked is what bugs me.

 

[deadheadskier]

nah, not cause its the baby is only 6 but because it takes one of us out of the house on the saturday before christmas when my kids havent seen much of their mom this week as it is. The fact that they knew this but still asked is what bugs me.

gotcha

would bug me too in your situation where your wife works nights. Touchy subject though, I too would be reticent with my friends unless it became a repeat issue. Probably chalk it up to them being new parents.

 

[severine]

Would bother me. But then again, we've only ever had family watch our kids and they're 4 and 2. I can't imagine asking someone with a family of their own to watch our kid(s) on a Saturday night unless it was an absolute emergency, regardless of the family situation re: hours worked.

 

[Puck it]

Love my kid's. But when it comes to others keep them to yourself especially if they they are young.

 

[mondeo]

Question in regards to why not asking family to babysit: are they transplants? Not an issue for me any time in the foreseeable future, but at least on my side of the family there won't be any potential sitters within a 6 hour drive. Also would mean that they probably wouldn't have had many chances to get out by themselves in the last 6 months.

 

[ckofer]

Get over it-but kindly lay down some ground rules for the future. Actually, I'd be a little more upset with my wife here. A lot of good points have been made:

- The parents probably needed a break
- You can judge the situation better based on their willingness to help you out
- I think the answer should have been "I'll check with my husband"
- Finding a sitter that you can trust is tricky

So basically, find some Christmas spirit and find a way to share how things should go in the future without hurting any feelings.

 

[ccskier]

I too would be pissed. If people need a break they should prepare. We never asked anyone besides our parents to watch our son at night time to go out. He is 3 now and we still don't ask anyone for night time shifts, not even his friends parents. If they wanted to go out, drop the $50 on a sitter. I would be too embarrassed to ask anyone to do that especially if I had a loud baby.