What do you do?

[ski_resort_observer]

I would likely go home and deal with the wife, just to avoid future conflict..she;d better have a better reason than "hates her job" or "sisters hubby is leaving her" those are hardly reasons to come home from a PLANNED ski trip with buddies.

Women are like elephants...they NEVER forget...you can be sure if you DONT go home...that will be thrown in your face for the rest of your life..

I refer to it at P.O.T.H. Power Of The Hole....women control the world
M

In the real mens world, the one that doesn't really exist anymore except for a few tough old married farts like myself, your one whipped puppy. That hook she has in your butt, does it hurt much? :wink:

My wife is a redhead and scottish and she does call me with situations like HPD's but not to come home but to have someone to talk to about the issues, to vent alittle, some spousal support and empathizing. The other thing is she and the three kids have cell phones but I do not. So I avoid the added stress that constant cell phone calls cause.

 

[loafer89]

My wife is a mix of Scottish, English and Irish descent, so she is very adaptable at handling stress, but she also likes to talk to me on the phone to vent, but not to be at her side. She married a snow loving nut and knew well in advance what she was getting involved with and would not ask me to come back home except in a dire emergency.

 

[skiprob]

Three pages and no one thought of this...

Offer to hire a car service to take her away and bring her up there with you.

Tell her to forget the kids, her job, the roof, her sister and her parents.

Explain that you didn't want to make this trip. You felt compelled to go and guilty for leaving her. What you really want is to be with her.

Chances are she'll buck up and be very touched that you offered and decline.

If she does take you up on the offer, don't flinch and start making the calls. Earn the relationship capital.

Best case scenario, the roof is fixed when you get home.

Worst case, you get to ski with her.

 

[highpeaksdrifter]

highpeaksdrifter You have my heart felt sympathy here...

Thanks OSB, but that isn't my life. I was just trying to get a thread going. I was going to spin it a different way, but was worried some would be kinda offended so I went with the old ball and chain routine.

 

[noski]

If a women called me up with this type of issue, it likely would suggest I had erred in pursuing the relationship. I don't mean to sound like a cold hearted bastard, my girl friend (freaking hate that word! someone needs to invent a word for "life commitment with out marriage") would never get so freaked out about something that I couldn't fix that she would demand I return home to.... to what? Nothing you could personally do to fix the situation, talking on the phone may help talk some stuff out any ways. Chances are that this wouldn't be a first time issue either but rather something that has been worked through before, etc. Some issues without a doubt I would pack up and head home ASAP. Death of a loved one, birth of a child, serious injury, hospital, etc. But interpersonal relationships that nothing can be done to fix by the man (in this case)? None sense. I learned long ago not to get involved with such drama. Just my take...

This is the crux. As a female noski, I would never be this woman. A simple "Suck it up, Cupcake" probably wouldn't go over well, but it would be warranted.

As for the word to replace girlfriend- the Census Bureau made a category for that called POSSLQ- Persons of the Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters. Now they just refer to it as "unmarried partner". CBS's Charles Osgood wrote a poem:

There's nothing that I wouldn't do
If you would be my POSSLQ.
You live with me and I with you
and you will be my POSSLQ.
I'll be your friend and so much more;
That's what a POSSLQ is for.

 

[tree_skier]

Firstly I would problably have the kids with me so she couldn't use that.

Second job sucks sisters husband left her wouldn't get me home and she knows it.

Third the roof is leaking might get me home but she would need to call our neighbor the carpenter to check it out first.

My wife knows how much I love skiing and how cheap I am. so it would have to be a major crisis to get me to return home after paying for skiing or lodging.

 

[andyzee]

Not a problem here, my wife is my favorite ski buddy :wink: So, she would not be home to call me, she'd be with me.

 

[shwilly]

Faulty premise. My wife would never miss a pow day!

 

[Greg]

Your wife calls, in tears, everything about her day has gone wrong. Her job sucks, she feels sick, the kids are in trouble in school, there is a leak in the ceiling, her sister’s husband has left her for another women and her aging parents are taking up more and more of her time. She says she really needs you to be home to be with her, please come home now. Other then the loss of your companionship your friends will not suffer from your departure. What do you do?

I doubt I would ever be faced with a situation like this. Perhaps the only time I'd be asked to come home is if something was seriously wrong with the kids or if my wife was seriously ill and couldn't take care of them and in that case I'd rather be home anyway. Maybe the leaky roof, but our house is only 2 years old so I don't see that happening either, but some other household "emergency" might need my expertise. I would never be expected to come home because of a bad day or stuff like that...

 

[highpeaksdrifter]

I am glad to hear that .. when I was married, she came up with the theory that it was my responsibility to know what it was that made her happy in life and my job to make sure it happened. I began to feel like an entertainment director.

One day, I come home after working an 12 hour shift to find her crying. It seems the 4, 7 and 9 year olds had gotten the best of her. Her sister and husband were having problems but I was beginning to feel I married the wrong sister. ;-) I never took up snowboarding earlier in my life because she said it was stupid for me to do it at my "age". She said she didn't have a "life" being at home with the kids. I told her go get a job if that is what she desires. She did .. had an office affair .. she moves in with her BF .. we divorce .. kids stay with me .. I learn to snowboard .. one of the better things to happen in my life.

Good for you. Yours is a powerful post. Not too many people would lay it all out like that for everyone to read. I like your style. 8)

 

[Grassi21]

I've received that call a few times. I offer, and am prepared, to come home if needed. But in every case she just needs to vent about the issue at hand and simply have me listen. I noticed a drastic drop-off in silly arguments after I stopped trying to solve her problems and just listen. My wife hates accepting help and would rather figure things out on her own.

Conversely, I need to talk things out, get suggestions, and then make my own decisions. The usual response I get from wifey is "why do you ask for my opinion if you rarely take it?"

 

[Goblin84]

no friends on a powder day! refuse is say!!


hmmm....maybe this is why im single?

 

[nycskier]

I would tell her to get bent! (I guess that is why I am single.)

 

[gladerider]

my wife married a ski nut. she accepted it.
she would call me to tell me all the events each night, but she would never ask me to come home. she would call me to find out what to do about the leaky ceiling. as for the other things you mentionded, my wife knows they are not good enough reasons.

 

[snoseek]

lose the cell phone!

 

[riverc0il]

This is the crux. As a female noski, I would never be this woman. A simple "Suck it up, Cupcake" probably wouldn't go over well, but it would be warranted.

It really doesn't have anything to do with being or not being a skier. My "POSSLQ" (and that will be the only time that I ever use that acronym) is also a "noski." It isn't so much a "suck it up" but rather whether a person's personality is psychologically co-dependent and/or can deal with emotional issues without "needing" a body there to comfort them when little things go wrong. Breaking up a big important trip of somone you love for selfish reasons of needing consoling for what I would consider non-life and death issues of matters of the heart doesn't fly with me. But that's just me and I certainly am not saying anything against that personality type... just saying it doesn't fly with me and I don't get involved with those personality types.

Regarding the semantics, the biggest problem I have is the connotations of "partner" and "significant other." I once mentioned that my significant other and I were doing something together during a conversation. An inquisitive mind decided to inquiry why I used "significant other." Nothing against the same sex persuasion, but personally I don't want people getting the wrong idea... if you know what I mean C'mon, I live in Vermont! "Domestic Partner" (which I claimed 'S' as to obtain shared health benefits) suggests something entirely different to most people! :lol:

 

[AHM]

HPD, you must be really bored to come up with a post like this..........

to quote Ms Hind.............................stop your sobbin'..............Hammer the hill. Oh, by the way a couple shots from Sorcerer lodge..........enjoy the summer!

 

[ckofer]

Ski nut marries high-maintenance woman.
Cost-benefit analysis is in order.
Only you know the costs and the benefits.

A little more work, and this could become Haiku.

 

[woodlandclown]

One of my pet peeves too. The English language seems to evolve daily, but a 50 year old man still introduces his 50 year old female companion as his girlfriend? WTF.

if you say anything other than girl/boyfriend it sounds like you are speaking of a gay lover though...i hate boy friend, but i am not going to use domestic partner!

also - if you are with someone who would call you up and make you come home from any kind of trip, you should get out while you can. its selfish. i can see how a woman in labor would be different or a death in the family, but a bad day at work and parent and sister issues arent cool. i dont think i would want to be with someone who would ski while i was in labor though.

 

[highpeaksdrifter]

if you say anything other than girl/boyfriend it sounds like you are speaking of a gay lover though...i hate boy friend, but i am not going to use domestic partner!
.

Yeah, but you’re not a girl anymore, your’re a woman and Phindog isn’t a boy any…..well, ok, bad example, but you get my drift.