Frustration With Kids

[jack97]

.... I'm hoping my daughter will be able to invite a friend along.

My daughter has gotten to the age where we are doing that. So far two trips with a friend, I wanted to make sure they can bring the bar up and down by themselves, then dad had to ski by himself.

 

[loafer89]

I can't say I really have too many problems skiing with my 8 year old son other than him wanting to know when we are moving to Maine to end the need for long trips in the car.

 

[billski]

The quotes from the childless are always entertaining...:roll: :wink:

I'm trying to figure out how the make the last few trips of the season interesting for the kiddos...for our next trip, I may see if my son's up for trying out a NASTAR course and I'm hoping my daughter will be able to invite a friend along.

Kids are really funny about racing. They love it, refuse it or do it but find it dull. My suggestion is to try it one run, gently try for a second run, but don't force it. The best advice I give everyone on gates is to just try to get around the gates the first time, don't worry about how long it takes.

My kids have a lot more fun with more ad-hoc stuff, like the little compressions on the side of the trail, the "beginner" jumps (i.e., Bolton has some nice "baby jumps"), little, easy low-angle, follow the leader through some woods along the side of the trail. They even think it's funny to get hungup in the woods, stalling out, etc. For my kids, they like to have some "war stories" to come back and tell Mom and friends.

If they're real little, take them to the easiest resort you can find, and get them on a (relatively easy, short) black diamond (or blue, relatively speaking) without them knowing about it. Bragging rights afterwards at the lodge. Makes them want to go back for more, once they find it's not so bad.

Kids are funny. At a certain age, many, (especially girls) won't want to venture beyond their comfort zone. They'll refuse something they've never tried. Very frustrating, but they have to be ready. You can't treat them as adults, or rationalized it.

I take their cue, if they refuse it I don't force it.

 

[hammer]

Kids are really funny about racing. They love it, refuse it or do it but find it dull. My suggestion is to try it one run, gently try for a second run, but don't force it. The best advice I give everyone on gates is to just try to get around the gates the first time, don't worry about how long it takes.

My kids have a lot more fun with more ad-hoc stuff, like the little compressions on the side of the trail, the "beginner" jumps (i.e., Bolton has some nice "baby jumps"), little, easy low-angle, follow the leader through some woods along the side of the trail. They even think it's funny to get hungup in the woods, stalling out, etc. For my kids, they like to have some "war stories" to come back and tell Mom and friends.

If they're real little, take them to the easiest resort you can find, and get them on a (relatively easy, short) black diamond (or blue, relatively speaking) without them knowing about it. Bragging rights afterwards at the lodge. Makes them want to go back for more, once they find it's not so bad.

Kids are funny. At a certain age, many, (especially girls) won't want to venture beyond their comfort zone. They'll refuse something they've never tried. Very frustrating, but they have to be ready. You can't treat them as adults, or rationalized it.

I take their cue, if they refuse it I don't force it.

Actually, my 15 YO son likes speed but he also likes to straightline trails...I was thinking of seeing if I have a chance to beating him on a race course since I can never beat him back to the lift. :wink:

And I agree 1000% on not forcing kids into something thay aren't comfortable with...too many times I see kids on trails well beyond their ability with their parents pushing them along. :angry:

 

[hiroto]

I'm trying to figure out how the make the last few trips of the season interesting for the kiddos...for our next trip, I may see if my son's up for trying out a NASTAR course and I'm hoping my daughter will be able to invite a friend along.

Pat's got great NASTAR course. They are dual course so you can have fun competing side by side with your son. Make sure you go to nastar.com to sign up you and your kids and get NASTAR number before you go to the mountain so that you can simply give them your number and money without the hustle of filling up forms.

We have no intention of raising racers, but NASTAR can be a fun acitvity to add variety to your recreational skiing.

 

[marcski]

Actually, my 15 YO son likes speed but he also likes to straightline trails...I was thinking of seeing if I have a chance to beating him on a race course since I can never beat him back to the lift. :wink:

And I agree 1000% on not forcing kids into something thay aren't comfortable with...too many times I see kids on trails well beyond their ability with their parents pushing them along. :angry:

I saw that yesterday. After much shouting, which could be heard from the lift overhead, they got a ski patrol, who actually just picked up the screaming kid and skied down with him in his arms.

 

[snobababunny]

Most of my frustration with my kids is due to my selfishness of not wanting to deal with them & wanting to go hit the trails by myself.

For years, my husband & I have taken turns staying with the kids. One waiting in the lodge with the kids & the other on the hill. We've also been lucky to have friends & family help us out. In years past, my kids could never last too long outside without complaining about this or that. Finally, this year, they are both at the point where it's no longer a gigantic chore to get them skiing. My 5 year old son is a spaz and can't wait to hit the hill. My 7 year old daughter is a bit more slow moving and cautious. I found that if I push them out the door too early, we start off on a bad foot and the day is an aggravating day. You definately need to feel them out. It's been so nice to finally be able to take some runs as a family & see that your kids are enjoying it just as much as you. I feel like we've paid our dues and now we're having much more fun now.

Sometimes, though, I do want to kick them in the ass & tell them, "Do you know how lucky you are that you are skiing?!" But then I fear of sounding like my father who walked to school up hill barefoot and I stop myself.

 

[MRGisevil]

I know of quite a few salt mines that are short on labor. Especially the kind that can fit into small spaces.

Or we could stick 'em all on a garbage barge and let 'em bare knuckle box until one emerges as king. Then sell it to fox as a reality show.

 

[SLyardsale]

Currently have a 11, 13, and 16 yearold. We've been skiing/riding together as a family for 7 years, but the last 4 seasons we picked 1 mountain, rented a place for the season, enrolled all 3 kids in seasonal programs and everyone has been relatively happy. Hardest thing now is tearing them away from their social life at home - they gripe - until we ski - then they have the time of their life.

 

[ckofer]

Hey where did KingM go? Did he go skiing and leave us here to raise the twins?

 

[Paul]

Or we could stick 'em all on a garbage barge and let 'em bare knuckle box until one emerges as king. Then sell it to fox as a reality show.

I think that one's been done.

 

[billski]

Hey where did KingM go? Did he go skiing and leave us here to raise the twins?

recuperating from accommodating all the powder hounds last weekend, I presume.

 

[billski]

Warning - huge generalizations follow. Yours are the exception, of course!

Simply put, most boys have a very different orientation about skiing than girls. With girls, especially after about age 10, it's more about who you are with, what you are doing, than it is about the skiing. Girls are moodier and more calculating.

Boys on the other hand, just get up and go, no holds barred. They never worry about crashing or where they are going. Keeping up with the everybody is key. Showing off, obnoxious behaviour, blah, blah blah. It's much easier to get boys to take a chance on something new than girls. With girls, you have to prepare them for it, talk them through it, encourage them. Boys just go. All they need when they crash is a little teasing to get them going again.

Of course there are some girls approach the sport very differently, are more athletically natural, they can be just as free-wheeling as the boys. But these are the exceptions.

I used to think in my naive days of fatherhood that I could treat both genders equally the same, provide the same opportunity and let them make choices without bounds. Doesn't work that way in real life. In many ways, raising girls is much more complex than boys. I have three girls, no boys. I watch what their male peers will do and it's astonishingly different as a group.

 

[SkiDork]

This is one reason we had ours in ski school when they were young. A lot less whining when they're not with mom and dad...

 

[SKIQUATTRO]

i have 2 girls (5 and 2.5) both skiing (trying to brainwash them early) they both love it, but you have to go with the flow when they are that age and sometimes you have to take one for the team and stop skiing even though every fiber in your body is pulling you back out onto the hill.....you have to make it fun

 

[hiroto]

All they need when they crash is a little teasing to get them going again.

How to handle the moment when small kid wipe out is very critial. The trick I use is to immediately wipeout myself right next to the kid (after quickly checking for traffic and when it is safe enough). Unless the kid is really hurting, she will immediately break out a smile and we'll just giggle. I'll help up the kid if she is tangled up but usuall demonstrate her what to do with her skies and get back up togather. This works really well to keep kid's spirit up and keep on skiing.

 

[Warp Daddy]

AS a father , grandfather and retired educator who has really ENJOYED kids al all stages of their growth and development I am Really enjoying reading about ALL the " Techniques" cited here .


Afterr living 64 years i don't know much but i do know The ONLY thing that is Certain about Childraising is this " ITS MORE ART THAN SCIENCE"

"Everthing is ALWAYS up for grabs" Differant Strokes for DIfferant folks really applys! There IS NO GOLD STANDARD method . And IF you are incredibly lucky they grow up well adjusted and value the efforts mom and dad put into their development

Keep encouraging , keep it fun, focus on BEING a family and JUST when ya think you figured IT out ------------------- IT"LL all change again .

I do agree with billski boys are more like dogs, up for fun , goofy and just want to be part of what's going on , girls like cats ARE way more complex and cerebral so differant strokes/motivations are what's needed here.

What is great to see here tho IS YOUR LEVEL OF CONCERN FOR YOUR KIDS -- GOOD JOB GUYS !!!!!!!!!!

 

[SIKSKIER]

But then I fear of sounding like my father who walked to school up hill barefoot and I stop myself.

Wow,he had it easy.According to my father he walked to school barefoot uphill BOTH ways.

 

[phil]

My son, now 12, who had done XC before, first tried downhill last year at an event for scouts at Roundtop in PA before Xmas. The conditions were awful:50 degree day, wet loose granular and crowded. I was returning to downhill after a 29 year break.

He loved it. and by early this winter it is now just arrange a meeting place and time and off he goes. He is skiing and enjoying trails that I don't have any desire to be on. To the extent that over Xmas break he skied Muleskinner on Saddleback by himself without poles and in a cast because he had broken his wrist on the playground 10 days before.
It can be a bit hard to deal with when you child is checking on your condition as you ski.
Admittedly he is a very competitive athlete in both soccer and competive swimming

 

[skiprob]

Awsome thread

I have no answers.

I truly enjoy the analogies describing boys and girls. I just use boys are DUMBER and girls are MEANER. My only frame of reference is my two boys (12 and 10) and girl (7) along with their friends.

A parent I admire whose son is an eagle scout and now attends Cornell gave me some advice I still remember. Let the kids call the shots. Give them a sense of control over the situation. If they want to stop and get some hot cocco. "That's a good idea." Ready to go back out? "So am I."

Yes, you will pay your dues as noted before.

In my case, with the boys, we made it an adventure. The whole packing the car, getting up early, the really yummy breakfast, unloading at the drop off.

With my daughter, my wife broke her arm one autumn and she stayed on the bunny hill with her for an entire season. Again, the little one called the shots.

My only rule was no whining. I explained that I busted my butt too much to have to hear that. If it happened, we would just stop whatever we were doing.

I also use outright bribery. At the end of the day, if it is a new place we go into the shop and get a little swag. Some stickers, patches and trail maps. They each have a pretty nice collection now.

Right now the two boys are in the race program and we ski with Emily. She is getting better than her mother now. Boy is mom getting angry about that.

My latest twist is to give them the choice of money for something to eat from the lodge or a contribution to the wii/HDTV fund. Right now the fund is winning.

I wonder how it all will end?